Lou Lou's World!

A 30 something girl in an ordinary world

My Family
Lou Lou - Me!::::::: Hubby - Long suffering husband ::::::: Princess - My almost 11 year old daughter ::::::: Beast Dog - My collie cross (who is anything but a beast! ::::::: Arum and Scarum - My folks::::::: Sis- My little sister who is taller than me!::::::: Scarlet - My bestest friend
Medically Me!
The two biggest medical events were in 1998 when I fractured my spine and in 2003 when I had a golf ball sized benign tumour removed from my breast.
Odd Me!
I broke my wrist trying to recreate Balero on roller skates, on my own... (twat)::::::: I'm very scared of mice, but cockroaches don't really bother me!(as much)::::::: I am a bit compulsive about washing my hands ::::::: I have Singstar rating singing "Heaven is a Place on Earth!"
Under Construction! - More to come here!
New Feature!!!!! The Friday Feature!
Friday, April 30, 2004
Friday Feature
Thought it might be fun to have a Friday Feature. This is gonna be pretty much anything we decide it to be. Today I've decided to add a joke. This is the one and only way I can ever tell a joke. I just can't do it no matter how I try something always gets lost on the translation i miss a keyword here add an extra word there. I just can't do it so here with the magic of cut and pasteing so i can't fuck it up for your entertainment is the Friday Feature!!!!
Lou Lou
Ps Tomorrow is our 1 month anniversary yay



Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that
morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say,
"Happy Birthday!", and probably have a nice present for me.
As it turned out, she didn't even say Good Morning, let alone Happy
I thought, well, that's wives for you, never mind,the children will
The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and very
As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss.
Happy Birthday".
Now I felt a little better that someone had remembered.
I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's
such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch,
just you and me."
I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's
We went to lunch, but didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to
a private little place.
We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful
day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"
I said, "No, I guess not."
She said, "Let's go to my place."
After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think
I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable"
"Sure!" I excitedly replied.
She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a
huge birthday cake -- followed by my wife, -- children, -- and dozens of our
friends, all singing Happy Birthday.
And I just sat there --- On the couch ----



After her sixth child, Jane decided that she should have some
cosmetic surgery "down below" to restore herself to her former
youthful glory. Time and childbirth had taken its toll as her bomb
doors were dangling a bit low and looked like a ripped out
fireplace. She reckoned that, with six children being the limit,
she'd tidy things up with a nip here and a tuck there so it looked
more like a piggy bank slot rather
than a badly packed kebab.

Following the operation she awoke from her anaesthetic to
find three roses at the end of the bed. "Who are these from?" she
asked the nurse, "They're very nice but I`m a bit confused as to why

I've received them."

"Well" said the nurse, "The first is from the surgeon - the
operation went so well and you were such a model patient that he
wanted to say thanks".

"Ahhh, that's really nice" said Jane.

"The second is from your husband - he's delighted the
operation was such a success that he can't wait to get you home.
Apparently it'll be the first time he's touched the sides for years and he's very

"Brilliant!" said Jane. "And the third?"

"That's from Eric, a patient in the burns unit," said the
nurse. "He just wanted to say thanks for his new ears"!

posted by Lou Lou @ 11:31:00 pm  
me again
The Show. Scarlet this evening was treated to a live performance of Princesses latest songs and dance moves via the mic and webcam. I am sure that's why she has gone to bed early tonight having suffered excrutiating high pitched notes.
I in turn was treated to a stunning tenacious d esq performance from scarlets son featuring guitar playing and lyrics one line about his mum not shaving her armpits lmao He has a talent for making people laugh and is every bit as quick witted as his mother. Luckily gene pool wise he has inherited Scarlets intelligence although we are not entirely sure where this as come from as you may be aware from her tales of her "challenged" mother. Luckily I can't see any bit of his father either. He could never compete with Scarlets brain. I always fell he felt inadaquet next to her. He was the Sunday sport to her The Times. lol
I digress again!!! Mercifully princess became hungry so the impromptu consert ended. (Scarlet and I thanking God our eardrumms hadn't burst!)
I've had a nice quiet evening. I even did some housework aren't i good? Theres no rush due to the bank holiday Yay!
Weekend plans........ food shopping. Having a nice quiet weekend, maybe the cinema on Monday. Nothing much. The weather doesn't promise to come to much at all. It's horrible here I have even turned my heating back on.
Well Just so you's all have something to laugh at this weekend a friend gave me
This Link So go find something that tickles your fancy, there's something for everyone here!
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:12:00 pm  
lots of crap that'll probably send you to sleep
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm yorkie bar. I know i shouldn't but I am. I'm feeling fantastic this afternoon on quite a high.
Last night was great. Sorry i didn't manage to get back on. We ate pizza a sweet and crunchy salad and 4 sticks of garlic bread!!! Oh and 4 bottles of wine too. Much laughter echoed in the Lou Lou land.
S it tuns out is a lovely girl. They also have a set a date all very exciting, will have to start loking for a nice hat lmao. K is very happy. Lovely to see them together. Anway a good evening and a late night.
Alarm clock went off this am at 6.45pm, snooze was turned on, but the bastard thing didn't go off again! So at 7.10 i got up woke princess and manically got the show on the road, till princess had a nosebleed and everything came to a halt! Luckily traffic was light this am so i actually managed to get to work on time, i really didn't think i would seeing as i left so late. Upon arrival I had to make a dash to the ladies. Too much food me thinks, anyway was fine afterwards and have spent the day without rumbles.
Work was busy. Two rude people put the phone down on me. (One day i would so love to be able to speak my mind to these arseholes) Luncheon was lovely, lemon chicken sarnies, and a lemon merangue pie again! I've spent the afternoon sorting out all the internal post, and dealing with admin and quieries. Nice and mellow, seeing as I was working late, usually on a friday i finish at 12.30am, but today i had agreed to stay till 4pm.
At lunchtime i made a quick call to hubby to remind him to collect princess from school early because she had an appt with opthamologist (eye doctor) and to make sure he booked her out in the school office too. Oh and all the stuff he had to tell the quack.
I've arrived home to be told she has to go back in a month at a time that will be impossible for me to arrange to have off work. She will need new glasses. Oh and her eyes have deteriorated again.
Now I am very proud of my baby. She never complains, she takes it all in her stride. She's worn glasses since she was 18months old. She broke the first pair inside 10 mins lol. I always endeavour to get her the nicest best glasses I can. Even her sunglasses i have had made prescription for her are very trendy. I always pick the trendiest designs i can, no character bollox for her. All very sleek and groovy. They suit her she is equally gorgeous with or without them. The eye that has worsened has a squint.
January 2 years ago she underwent an operation to correct it, One of the hardest things i have ever had to do, it's be most awful feeling of complete and utter helplessness as you hold your child in your arms as they put the needle in to put her under anthestetic as you feel your child go completely limp, your eyes cloud and tears fall. It was horrible. The time she was in theatre took forever. I tried to read and couldn't. Hubby went shopping to buy pressies for when she came round, he arrived back with several carrier bags from the disney store.
When she came around I could barely look at her, all i wanted to do was hold her close. But her eye was so full of blood it took all my strength not to look away ( i am squeamish to say the least) The operation was a sucess, although undercorrected the results were great. Unforunately the last two years it has started deteriorating month by month and her eyes have got worse, she has had stronger glasses to see if it pulls it in but alas it looks like my baby will have to have another op. Bugger.
I love her so much. She never complained. Only when we had to put the drops in. She hates drops. Shes so brave.
Anyway back to me
I'm feeling great i have no idea why. I'm looking good today too felling pretty foxy and i have a spring in my step.
Princess has just come in to show me her collage she is making ( shes really arty) and she's miffed cos it's just not going ehr way and the glue is just drying fast enough and it doesnt look right and its just not going her way lmao. she's so stroppy sometimes Oooooh i can hear her ripping it to pieces now!!
Tonights plans. To read blogs to post on here to watch friends, and maybe will and grace. She is asking me what I am doing now. She wants to know if she can write a post!!! Who knows maybe I should let her what do you think? She's writing a song at the moment now, its about a mini quelle surprise shes as mad about mini's as i am lol So far I have managed educate her farily well, she loves good music ( how many 7yr olds do you know that like aerosmith, the whitestripes the red hot chillies, good charlotte and likes jazz too? of course she also likes busted what 7yr old doesn't? her favourite song is "staceys mum she's got it goin on" (not busted not sure who sings it)she knows all the words and the moves lmao) She also likes musicals, (hubby cursing me for getting her into those lmao like she has a choice she loves singing and dancing she is a multi faceted child. (Ta hans for the word) Ooooohhh i'm such a proud mummy!!
Well i guess by now you're all asleep cos this is such a shit post
i'm gonna bugger off and post later something fun gonna speak to the firls and maybe put a wee quiz together.
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 5:38:00 pm  
Ho Hum........
Thursday, April 29, 2004
OOOh bloody hell.......I neeeeeeeeeeeed to post...but my life is so God damn boring at the moment I don't know where to start..lmao
Ermmmmmmmmm let me see......weather is abysmal..got rained on twice from the heavens ....I knew there was a reason I didn't bother with the straighteners this morning...have pretty wild hair, its also pretty short and pretty red...oh and black...eeek that sounds pretty ermmmmmmmm un-Mum-like...lol
My 11 year old daughter thinks its cool....and that is good enough for me...its her I go to for my honest opinion...I mean its no good going to the man of the house...men are always so "nice" when it comes to opinions on outfits...I don't want "nice", I want honesty.....I want "No you look like a bag-o'-shite go change you scruffy cow!!!" NOT.........."Mmmmm do you really think that colour goes with your eyes"...lol I mean wot colour goes with blue eyes and red and black hair??? Oh I know BLACK!!! Hmmmm not got much black in my wardrobe...I'm a colour girl you see...and plenty of it!!!
OMG.....husband's just got in early....wot's he up to checkin up on me I guess...better go and make him a cuppa......laced with love and arsenic..tee hee
Love ya
posted by Lou Lou @ 4:54:00 pm  
My day off so far has been spent drinking copious amounts of tea, pmsl at sites and blogs, wrapped in a duvet feeling yukky.
This afternoon though once i have collected princess from school i shall be stepping up a gear into my hostess with the mostest pinny on. We have visitors coming tonight from Bolton. Hubby's best mate and partner will be here early evening. Apart from the small amount of housework i did this am there is still an amount to be done. Including making thier bed, the bed that at this moment in time my feet are on as i am stretched out typing. Including dinner. WTF am i going to do for dinner? Of course vino is already taken care of, some nice Banrock station shiraz shall be chilling in the fridge, K is rather partial to it we down a few bottle last time he came to stay me and him. S his new partner I have never met although we have spoken do i cook to impress?
oh gotta go door
lou xxx
posted by Lou Lou @ 2:24:00 pm  
Firtsly I would like to say Thank You to 2 bloggers who've made me laugh today Andre Torrez for the suggestion his readers visit This and also to Ian for suggesting we go look at This Thanks also to Hans for introducing Ian's blog to me, now blogrolled.
These links have given me a huge laugh today. I thank you both
Lou lou

PSMISSELAINENEOUS I wish it to be noted the link to tron man originated with this nice blog go check it out if u havent already!!! Sorry for the misscredit Elaine!
posted by Lou Lou @ 12:23:00 pm  
This is hell, this is tortureAndre what are you trying to do to us all? The suspence is killing me now how dare you leave us all hanging begging for more? I will not rest until i know.
April 20th he last posted about his ongoing situ will they wont they with Stone.. It's the 29th now the bloody 29th. We need to know. Have you? Are you? Are you sat somewhere licking your wounds? Oh purlease for the love of God put me out of my misery.
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:48:00 am  
Another Day
Wednesday, April 28, 2004
I've in part had a bitch of a day and in part not. Work was very busy today, although we all had a lot of laughs there.
Guess Scarlets not the only one feeling poorly sick, I've been very woozy today. And yes I have eaten properly lunch for me was a cheese, ham, sweetcorn and tomato quiche and a large slice of lemon merangue my favourite favourite pudding. I also had a cuppa soup at work so it's not lack of nourishment oh and some cheddars. Tonight dinner was nice and easy chicken korma. Oh and a bit earlier i had a big bowl of cornflakes too. Yet I still feel lightheaded. Oh well I have a day off tomorrow so I will be reading blogs like a woman possessed.
Oh i've just noticed the comments aren't woking wonder why.
I can't actully think of anything really interesting or even witty or funny, i feel that crap so in a mo I think i will go to bed, yes i know it's not 10 yet but i really do feel that crap.
On a nice note i watched 9 months tonight. I hated hugh's hair in that one. Anyway in the end i sat in silent tears. (hoping hubby hadn't noticed so he could take the piss) I really do want one. I really really do. It's odd i knew i would like another one, but I didn't actually realise till that moment during the delivery scenes how much i do. I know I really must want one cos those are the bits supposed to put you off. Princess is 7 now. For years i have said i only wanted one, the last 18 months i've become ready to have another, Only thing is I don't think hubby is. Don't get me wrong we're happy with Princess we know we are lucky to have her, but now I really would like a baby. Oh well maybe one day.
I'll shut up now
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:39:00 pm  
A message from Scarlet
Scarlet is feeling well poorly sick and has asked me to apologise on her behalf for her lask of posting today. Hopefully she will be back as normal tomorrow after a good nights sleep
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:37:00 pm  
Dum, Dee, Dum, De Dah........................
Hmmmmmmmm mid week already and.................f*ck all has happened...lol
Watched Most Haunted last night and almost p*ssed myself with fright.....I f*ckin hate that, pissin myself that is...lol
I dunno why I watch these things....I mean I'm a believer..in everything..spirits, the after-life, ghosts..the lot and I sit down and watch this programme religiously every week and without fail I always jump and half scare myself to death and then have to go to bed....too f*ckin scared to get out and go to the loo in the night just incase I see an orb or something (for those of you not in the know this is apparently the beginnings of a spirit manifestation...) f*ckin freaky or wot????
My husband, bless him always p*sses himself at just how freaked out I actually get.... We lived in a house once, which had 3 spirits there and I know they were cos I felt there presence was even touched by one once...tickled the back of my neck...very weird experience, I can also smell a presence too...don't get me wrong I'm not particularly in tune with this sort of thing...infact it frightens me but I guess I am open to suggestion and believe that there are things we cannot see and cannot explain.
Anyway enough of the spooky chat......have a shed-load of shite to do today as have work later.....hmmmmm lovely..maybe Mr Flirty will grace me with his basket and packet of 3!!! He f*ckin wants to....lmao
I'm just in the mood for him tonight...will probably tear strips off the bugger....lets hope its really busy so I can totally humiliate him.....awww I know you almost feel sorry for him don't ya? Don't bother he's a f*ck wit...a married f*ck wit at that.
Well enough of me over to you...leave us comments and plenty of them...tell us how much you love us...tee hee or NOT!
Love Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu and you and you and you!!!!
posted by Lou Lou @ 1:41:00 pm  
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Wanted to share this with you all it's really sweet and I think a nice way to end an evening's blogging. Goodnight all!
Lou Lou

The Pocket Angel

I am a tiny angel I’m smaller than your thumb;
I live in people’s pockets.
That’s where I have my fun.
I don’t suppose you’ve seen me,
I’m too tiny to detect;
Though I’m with you all the time.
I doubt we’ve ever met.
Before I was an angel ….I was a fairy in a flower;
God, himself hand picked me
And gave me Angel power.
Now God has many angels
That he trains in angel pools;
We become His eyes and ears and hands.
We become His special tools.
And because God is so busy,
With way too much to do;
He said that my assignment
Was to keep close watch on you.
Then he tucked me in your pocket,
Blessing you with angel care;
Saying I must never leave you,
And I vowed to stay right there!


posted by Lou Lou @ 11:16:00 pm  
Blaaaaaaaaaaaa Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Bleeeeeeeeee
Scarlet bless her is up for adoption, she of course will need an amount of guidance especially given that she had forgotten that she had turned 32 a few months ago and was no longer 31. Poor love. It comes to us all you know.....senility. I know babe you prefer to call it eccentric!

Well I did do a paragraph then about my own personal eccentricites there but i have decided against it. What shall I say instead?

Oh I know Evie. Evie and I also go way back, i met her when i was pregnant with princess, we were work collegues, And have remained friends ever since. I don't really want to go into detail, but i will say we were firm friends from the beginning, and when I am a friend to someone I will do what i can to help them should they ever need me, even at 3 o'clock in the morning. One day Evie called, I was there for her when she needed me the most. I'm honoured she chose to call me, I'm humbled she chose me over all others. Anyway we've been mates for years. Thats that!!! There I said I wasn't going into detail!!!! I am getting far too mushy just lately!!!

I have made a twat of myself, I am so embarrassed! (OK so whats new?)

Hans post from today was about Chewbacca and wierd cofffee. So off i went to comment.

whats a wookie?
was chewbacca in battlestar galactica?
yeah i know scarlet i'm a twat not to know lol
lou lou | Email | Homepage | 04.27.04 - 5:23 pm | #

Not only that but i managed to post this bloody comment twice lol.
I now know what and who, hubby laughungly filled me in on it tonight when i asked him.
I honestly have never seen any of the Star Wars Films. Oh, i did see a bit of the episode one thing, so you see take pity on a poor ignorant girl i did not know. I'm not that much of a twat honest! Funny though i know what an ewok is i don't know why though!
Now I have publicaly humiliated myself lol,

Imagine my excitment when through the letterbox came a "personal invitation to preview our new range and enjoy our special offers as a select vip etc etc"
Matalan. So we went. We wish we didn't. It was crap. There was nothing i liked in my size, although i did get a new bathrobe with elephants on it! There was hardly much of anything at all. So much for previews.... exciting special offers before members of the general public. What a bloody waste of time that was, and it's not exactly round the corner either. Bugger. Sometimes you can get such great stuff there obviously tonight was not the night.

I'm bored now, I'm boring myself i think i'll shut up and go read blogs or play games or something. Maybe i should actually go to bed before 11.30 for a change. who am i trying to kid?
Still amazed we past 1000 and today it looks like we will break 1100 WOW people WOW i am so very chuffed. oh well thats it
lou lou

posted by Lou Lou @ 10:20:00 pm  
Adoptive Persons Wanted
Scarlet aged 32 is in need of new guardians and is offering herself for adoption.
Scarlet is:
Petit and exotic looking with fantastic eyes and jet black hair,
A superb fun loving personality and the ability to drink most blokes under the table.
A good cook, willing to atttempt housework. Oh and a great pair of tits.

Please apply in writing into the comments box below stating why you would be the best possible gurdian for Scarlet. Don't delay offer is not expected to last for long! First to see will snap her up!

many thanks
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 4:52:00 pm  
my Mother is a twat--Part 2
If you haven't read my fisrt post on my slightly mental mother, you may be a bit shocked that she isn't care in the commmunity. But don't be alarmed she does have grown-ups with her almost 24/7, and to be honest the only danger is to herself mainly.
She phoned me in a panic yesterday morning
" i am just picking up my new mobile phone from the shop, because your dad has broken down, and i can't get hold of him"
FACT 1... she already has a mobile phone.
FACT 2.....My is dad deaf, and does not have a mobile phone.
FACT 3... He has break down cover.
FACT 4.... I knew this was gonna take up most of my day.
so off i trundle to mothers, it turned out she had turned her old mobile off that was why it was not working, so sort out canceling the order where the bloke had quickly established she was mental and sold her a 2 hundred pound mobile which i would not be able to get her to work that in a month of sundays.
Anyway dad phones again, well she was shouting so hard there was no need for mobile phones.
people in the street walking past were looking around to see if they could see who was shouting " ARE YOU ALRIGHT" one bloke answered " WELL CAN'T COMPLAIN LOVE"
i grabbed the phone off mother it turned out he brought bacon for tea and was on his way home phoning because it was late and he didn't want her to worry.(ironic really)
Now i am wondering which one of them is deaf or maybe both of them, after i poked her with shitty sticks i came home.
praying if it was possible to be adopted at the age of 31.
please god. i won't say fuck for a week i promise.

An exasperated
p.s I love her to death really ( quite literally infact )
posted by Lou Lou @ 4:05:00 pm  
To be or not to be....a Lesbian that is!!!!!
Well ladies...I would do the quiz and give my opinion on this great debate...but I can't f*ckin get in...arrrrghghgh...lol
I'm sure when I finally do it will just tell me wot I already know...that there is a virgin lesbian on the inside just waiting to be released...Lmao
I have a good friend...who was married and who had a husband who didn't mind that she was bi-curious and "allowed" her to experiment with his full consent.....pretty decent of him don't you think..either that or he's a f*ckin idiot.......BIG CLUE HERE..they're not married anymore!!!!
Anyway knowing that she had...."done the deed" so to speak, I being me....a f*ckin nosey witch...wanted all the details..was it any good, wot did it feel like, would she do it again? All the usual bi-curious questions...needless to say I was intrigued as I always have been..lol
I think its different for us girls...I mean I can look at another woman and think..God she's beautiful or she's got a great body....or she'd get it...lol No but seriously, do you think guys do the same thing....er A BIG FAT NO....me thinx You can just imagine it can't ya...a group of guys outside the pub in the summer, a good lookin attractive guy walks past, pretty fit, obviously takes care of himself, been on the sunbed....nicely golden (you get the picture ladies.....stop droolin..lol) now would these guys compliment another guy????? Would they f*ck....Wot about "Jeeez he's fit...look at the arse on that!" NO F*CKIN WAY!!!!! See... guys think if they look at other guys that way or appreciate another guy's body and the work they've put in it makes them GAY...Duh......Lmao That's guy mentality for you!
Sorry for all of those guy's out there who can appreciate other guy's bods without a guilty gay thought entering your head.....I bet there are only a handful of you though...lol
Anyway enough of going off on one...I better get back to me daily chores..well when I say get back to, I actually mean start them.........ahhhh I'm such a bad housewife, I mean who f*ckin likes housework anyhow?????? E-mail us now I'll give ya me number....especially guys who like nothin better than hoovering naked...lmao Well.... there have gotta be some perks to being a housewife...tee hee
Love ya
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:12:00 am  
Can't even be a lesbian!
Monday, April 26, 2004
Well, just taken fluffy's quiz to find out if i should be a lesbian, and i am very disturbed by the answer, which was.
you should not become a lesbian.
What the fuck Does that mean? Other than i would make a really bad one,for a single woman this isn't good news not only am i fuckwit with men , it is now obvious i'd be a fuckwit with woman too.
Whats left folks?
Please advise people i am on the verge off topping myself or becoming a nun, and i bet they get more action than me right now!

A very confused Scarlet.
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:34:00 pm  
Sharing with you all like a good girl!
I was sent this email earlier this evening and I thought that I would share it all with you since it made me giggle! Let me know your suggestions for mail/female items and why in the comments box

lou lou

You may not know that many non-living things have a gender; For example...

1) Freezer Bags -- They are Male, because they hold everything in, but
you can see right through them.

2) Copiers -- They are Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to
warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right
buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

3) Tyres -- Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

4) Hot Air Balloon -- Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have
to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

5) Sponges -- female because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

6) Web Page -- Female, because it's always getting hit on.

7) Subway -- Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

8) Hourglass -- Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the

9) Hammer -- Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000
years, but it's handy to have around.

10) Remote Control -- Female...... Ha! You thought it'd be male. But
consider this -- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and
while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.

posted by Lou Lou @ 10:57:00 pm  
Those lovely people at Google invited us to try out their new email Gmail so we thought we would take them up on it! From now on you can email us at:


Will add it to the side bar shortly!


Lou Lou
Site Techhead ( i said tech not twat scarlet)

posted by Lou Lou @ 10:51:00 pm  
Errrrrrrrrrrr Monday...I think!
Hullo all you readers out there...and boy there are quite a few of you.............reached the 1000 visitors on the counter today.............WOW....I mean f*ckin WOW.......fan-bloody-tas-tic WOW.....sorry just a little bit excited by the prospect of so many peeps reading about our ordinary lives...He he
I guess we all think our lives are ordinary until we share a little piece of ourselves with someone else, I guess that's how we make good friends, great friends if we're lucky.
I don't think I really have one person who I could call a best friend, I have several and I love them all dearly, they have all been there for me when I've been feelin blue, held my hand, wiped away a tear, gave a comforting hug or offered words of wisdom. Laughed out loud at the same jokes, shared the joys of our children, whinged over husbands and the drudgery that is housework. Some friends we only know for a short time, but in that time they can make such a difference....one of those friends I am proud to say is Lou Lou, a long time ago now, we met albeit briefly......when I needed a favour and could trust no other it was her I turned to and she delivered..... as good friends do with no questions asked, she opened a door for me when I saw no other way out and for that my sweetheart I will always be grateful...mwah
I have good friends too that I have never met, people who I have met here and shared my life with..people who have crept into my heart and brightened my world and offered a shoulder to cry on or just a listening ear...you know who you are...my thanx go to you too xx
God this post is turning into something f*ckin depressing..SNAP out of it girl......lol
Enough about friends and wot they can do for you...good friends do it without askin..wink wink
Time is gettin on and I need to go rest my weary body in a hot and steamy bath...for once without the rugrats......and contemplate wot tomorrow will bring to my sad, sweet existence...lol
The same f*ckin shit I should imagine...your right Lou Lou..life is wot you make it..tomorrow I'm starting with a whole new bag of ingredients and a new recipe...tee hee
Love to you all
Ps Life is full of friends we have yet to meet.............lookin forward to it!
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:21:00 pm  
Mundane but it's my life!
Yet again the sunshine is beating down on us, and it's really quite hot!
It's Monday morning so I have been busy. Taken Princess to school, been and paid some bills, posted letters, been to physio, been to the garden centre,been to the doctors and dropped off my 24hr specimen, taken washing in, hung washing out, repotted favourite plant, tidied house and unstacked dishwasher, it's not quite 12pm yet! So now I can relax for a little while before i have to get ready to go to work.

Scarlet has already popped in and posted........the shitkicker really is as bad as she says I can vouch for that. In fact i think she goes easy on him. I must admit it makes my heart feel good to know he is suffering. I'm not a nasty person I'm very sweet and loving, but he really does deserve what he gets. Of course I'm not what you would call impartial since she is my bestest friend in the whole wide world!!!!
Scarlet was my first visitor when I had princess, she was there when I fractured my spine (6 years ago all sorted now), a constant visitor to the hospital and it has to be said and a great support to hubby (they've been having a secret affair for years pmsl ) She is one of those rarities in life, that's known as a true friend. We piss each other off, and take the piss out of each other, we bounce off each other and always always have fun together. She's more than my best friend. She's family, and I love her. I value her friendship more than I can say.
OMG that went a bit mushy, me and my tangents lmao Anyway she's my best bud.

I've been and taken the Lesbian Quiz Fluffy suggested. It told me nothing new......I'm completely straight!!!!! Now I suppose you all think that's boring! I've never even been hit on by a lesbian. (would I realise if i had? I'm so damn sheltered!) In fact I don't actually know any. What a boring life I lead lol Actually I just recalled I did know someone who's Bi when she felt like it anyway!!!!

Life ladies and gents is what you make it. If it's shit make it better. You have the power!!!!
Not sure why I just typed that I just felt like it lol

Well enough crap i'm gonna go and surf for a bit, i need a pee now anyway (thank God I don't have to put it in that bloody pot now I pissed on myself more times that I care to recall!!!)

Have a glorious day
Lou Lou

posted by Lou Lou @ 11:50:00 am  
Shitkicker part 3
Sunday, April 25, 2004
Well has you know i had the weekend to myself, which means only one thing, shitkicker himself was down, and you can probaly guess we had an argument. over........wait for it........ not producing enough sun block for himself.
i kid you not , he kind of hobbled into the house muttering under his breath,
" fucking bitch did this on fucking purpose"of which the only response one could do was to piss one's pants off, while showing off one's beautiful golden glow.
He was friggin glowing, his feet had blistered and his forehead well what can i say, you could fry eggs on it. if he wasn't blaming me for the "glow in the dark look" i would have felt sorry for him.
But instead i pointed out that it was not my place now to provide sun protection and if you were't such a cheap shitkicker, you wouldn't be glowing like a beacon.
To add insult to injury he hobbled out of the house with all the dignity he could muster, only to get hit in the head with a football, from the children across the road, to which i think you could have heard his screams for miles around, now the poor bastard had enough problems as it were, and ofcourse it got worse because i now was laughing uncontrollably, which sent the children off too.
All you could hear was shitkicker muttering to his car.
" fucking bitch it is all her friggin fault"
All in all a good weekend all around.
Except shitkicker ofcourse.

posted by Lou Lou @ 10:56:00 pm  
Not exactly a day of rest!
Last night hubby and I started another patch in our garden for grass repair. We have clay based soil and it cracks really bad in the summer and floods really bad in winter, not to mention the added wear and tear of our family pet "mental" our collie cross. (she's actually a very loving, calm sweetheart who is quite like her owners!being mental lol)
The other patches we've done are growing nicely although they still need to be cordened off a little while longer.

Today is the day I do my 24hr sample! It's not even half full yet. Am i gonna get told off for not drinking enough? It's been met with much mirth within the four walls of lou lou land and piss taking (excuse the pun!) Will drop it to the doctors tomorrow and wait 2 weeks for the results.

We had our first barbeque today, after going to Tesco, Homebase, B and Q and Co-Op before arriving at Sainsbury's to purchase a small bag of charcoal, it had to be that special easy light stuff too. They had huge sacks of it at the other places but hubby refused for some reason known only to himself ( I mean we only have the rest of the summer and barbeques every week) to buy a big sack insisting a small one would do. God he pisses me off sometimes, you know once we drove a 45 mile round trip cos he had heard petrol was 3p cheaper a litre. (where the fuck is the logic in that i ask you!)

Princess has been a sweetie today no only child rants which is great (what I call it when she goes off on one, only child syndrome!) She's all tucked up in bed now watching "Born and Bred" she loves it. She'll be well pissed off when she finds out it's the last in the series! I'm looking forward to new programs this week there are some goodies starting.

I've been pretty busy, I've added Unky Moods to us here. I've discovered all I never knew about Frotting lmao Ta Fluffy. We've had a visitor to the site today from Russia which is pretty exciting. Well it's amazing to know how many people we are reaching after 3 weeks really we never imagined anyone else would want to read us.

I've giggled at Scarlets latest post, pissed at her cos she never invited me. I couldn't have gone but that's besides the bloody point! I've popped in and out of my usual blogs, disovered a few new ones, not decided whether to add them to links yet a couple more days and we shall see. Impress Me!!!!!!!! (using telepathic powers now)
If you haven't read anyone in the links bar, please go visit and see what you are missing.
Well I had better get my arse in gear I have huge ironing pile to get through Hubby has said he will help me (Ooooooooh i love him!)

Lou Lou
xxxxxxx ;)
posted by Lou Lou @ 8:27:00 pm  
A link i didn't include yesterday!
Dunelm Mill This is that fantastic store, if you've not been locate your closest and check it out! Be prepared to have a boot full and an empty wallet lol
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 8:25:00 pm  
Evil in our midst
I have contracted a case of "offer optimizer", a nasty bit of spyware OUCH! It's virulent, but i think I have managed to get shot of it. I have no idea how this crept through my steel barriers i have internet security up to the hilt. You namee it i have it!!!!!
You might not even notice you have it. Basically when you click on a link IE opens up an new window and if you are quick you'll see it says offer optimizer before it closes. I think i might actually have gotten rid of it now, I've updated my ad aware and so far so good.
Anyway if you have it make sure you go get Adaware at Cnet Downloads and get the bugger off your system.
lou lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 8:14:00 pm  
Bloody Hell Scarlet!!!!
He He sounds like you had fun girlfriend!!!!!
Organised chaos hey.....it must of been bloody great....were any of the Geordie lads lookers???? Or were ya too p*ssed up to give a t*ss girl...lol
you've had a pretty cool weekend too Lou Lou, just some time with you and Princess and some me time which as we all know as mother's is pretty far and few between but oh so precious when it comes....which is why I was at work all day today......its the only real me time I get...lol Lucky for me I love my job so its not really a chore although having to spend the day inside when it was so glorious outside was a bit painful but apart from that I had a good day....no grouchy customers, plenty of screaming rugrats though..lol
Sat down and watched a couple of DVD's last night, glass of wine, nice supper...was warming towards hubby, 'til 20 mins into Bad Boys 2 his head fell back and he started catching flies...arrrrghghghgh.
I mean i know he's been at work all day...but how the hell do you fall asleep while Will Smith is doing his thang, shooting up half the cast of the movie, explosions, chase scenes..the lot????
I mean ffs it was only 2115...wot's a girl to do????
I got the chocolate out, and consoled myself in a way only us girl's know how.........I PIGGED OUT!!!!!
Needless to say I had a Slimfast for lunch today...feeling slightly guilty for my over indulgence on the choccy front.....awh f*ck it the diet starts again on Monday...lol
Well I gotta sign off, fairly uninteresting weekend I know.....still the sun shone and l'm still smiling so not all is bad..right?
Love you all......well not all of you....oh alright, but one at a time...tee hee
Ps Watched Vanilla Sky too...wot the f*ck is that all about????? Lmao
posted by Lou Lou @ 6:16:00 pm  
Anarchy in the local
Well i had the weekend to myself, which meant sunbathing,drinking and eating out in, that order.
Which was bloody brilliant!
my friend had informed me she was running one of our local pubs on her own, with no experience of bar work and for added pressure, a saturday night aswell !!!!
She said come along and "i give you free drinks" well enough, said off i went with the bonus of watching her fuck up!!
I walked in a 9'00pm to see what can only be described has Anarchy in the u.k
After awhile things got worse there were more people behind the bar than you can shake a shitty stick at another barmaid turned up to work ,
ahhhh saviour at last, we thought but it turned out she was more pissed up ,than the 12 geordie lads asking for 12 pints pronto,they soon got wind of the situation, which was obvious to a blind man .That the bar was now being run by sombody who was now in a state of i really don't give a fuck, and the other one was standing because she was being held up by the lager pumps.
Ofcourse i offered to help but she said no, she has the nice geordie lads lending a helping hand pouring themselves free drinks, well the rest of the bar thought fuck this and decided to do the same,
geordies were now in the same state has the bar maid 2 of them collapsed in a drunken stuper behind the bar, bottles were now being passed around to everyone and then the landlady appeared.
That was when i left,
I have to say, it was one of the funniest and cheapest nights out ever, if and when she runs the pub again i'll give you all a shout, but i did say to her.
"monkeys will fly out of my arse, before she ever asks you to do this again."

posted by Lou Lou @ 2:45:00 pm  
Pay Attention!
Saturday, April 24, 2004
Due to lack of things to do (don't remind me about the ironing!) I have been busy and I have joined blogrolling. So If you wanna link to us more easily you can, and it's gonna make my life much easier me being the one that gets left doing all the techie stuff.
So feel free to blogroll us!!!!

Oh and while I'm at it comments.......Lots of you are leaving here without telling us you've been!!!! We could do with some feedback anything you think we could improve on, seeing as we are just baby bloggers not even a month old! Happy Birthday one month to us next weekend on the 1st!

So Ladies and Gents Please be forthcoming and please be honest.....We need to know if we are shit! We might cry if you tell us so but we need to know! This isn't a trick question like does my bum look big in this!!!!LOL

So be good girls and boys and do as you are told!!!!

Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 6:35:00 pm  
Busy Busy Busy
Well I have been a busy girl today. This morning I almost sprang out of bed! Shocking for me. I munched breakfast and set about hoovering with gusto, and a spot of dusting. Showered, Hair straightened (no casualties today!) and dressing I was looking good (Yep Nutty I was having a "I look damn fine day" celebrating my entry into Hans file of MILF's.) Hair perfect, make up just enough, my fave big hoops and jeans and strappy top, toenails painted shocking pink and I was ready to go!
Princess on my arrival downstairs had dressed herself and was promptly sent back to change her having adopted the hobo look. Her t-shirt was acceptable but did not coordinate with the rest i thought i had drummed this into her by now clothes have to match. Her t-shirt was actually her favourite. "My mummy drives a Mini" in bright pink. She was my pride and joy, the Mini. Hubby and I were doing her up for fun but sold her (in January) due to running out of time and space. I cried broken hearted for 45 mins as the guy I sold her to drove her away. I have a passion for Mini's, proper Minis not shitty bmw ones. One day I will have another, a lovely Downton engineered Cooper if I am a very lucky girly. And I win the lottery!
Now where was I ? Oh yes hobo, well i got her changed and we set off. Hubby in his mates MGF with the top down (no room for us) and me and Princess in my Clio. Shopping was accomplished. The obligatory visit to Claire's Accessories was done, and then Princess stayed with hubby and his mate whilst i did some me shopping. Happy with my purchases 6 super tops, we went for luncheon. Had yummy pizza. Then treated Princess to some lovely sandal's in Ravel. Not for school.
Hubby and his mate went on elsewhere and Princess and I went to Dunelm Mills. As usual I went a little mad in there. If you haven't got a store near you it's kind of like Ikea but without the furniture on a smaller scale. Fan bloody tastic. Had a trolley full, but only spent £32. 1x kingsize duvet, 1xsingle duvet, 1x single duvet cover, 2x orthopeadic pillows and lots of little bits. I love it there they are amazing value and the stuff is good quality.
Princess's Now 57 blaring, sunroof fully back windows down we cruised home. I have had a few winks today lots of smiles and nice looks. Oooooooooh it's been a good day for the self esteem. As i saidI'm having a damn fine day!!!!! Now tomorrow i will probably be back to I feel like shit, i look like shit, I am shit. But today I will enjoy the feeling!
Had a mad minute or so after we got home and I've cleaned the windows! Princess has been yelling in her bedroom cos I am evil and am making her tidy it up although she says she has now finished (inspection shortly) and Hubby poor lovey is home, exhausted after shopping with his mate and spinning about in the MGF looking cool (?) (does that not mean aging trying to look young in this instance?), and is now asleep on the sofa! (Too much fresh air obviously!!!)
Here I am Saturday afternoon with nowt else to do but blither on and bore you all, well that isn't exactly true I have 2x 3ft piles of ironing to do but I am NOT doing them today!!
Hope you all had fun today and enjoyed the sunshine, there's more to come!
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 4:26:00 pm  
Here's one I did earlier......enjoy the sun xx

Above the hills the sun is setting,
Already another day its forgetting,
The crimson sky lights the earth,
Another moontime has it's birth,

Jade the grass that covers the earth,
Golden the sun that shines it's worth,
So blue the sky that roofs our world,
All the shades of dreams untold.

A darkness smothers the light,
Silence; As the day turns to night,
Another day is over again,
Already tommorow comes creeping in.
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:11:00 am  
Wahey.......the weekend is here
Hey all you lovely peeps in Blogland...the sun is out indeed and shining its little butt off.....peoples smiles are that much brighter, the kids are that much happier, the washing gets dry so much bloody faster..LOL
I love that song Lou Lou kind of makes you go all warm and mushy inside, reminds you that the world is a good place to be in..........(aaah, sighs deeply).
I too saw the film you mentioned...Minority Report and struggled with the plot, have seen it three times now and it never ceases to amaze me just how scarey that English bird..Samantha Morton is it???..... looks with her head shaved.....doesn't have quite the same affect as Grrrrrrrr Tom Cruise.....ummmm well it may do if your that way inclined...but hey butch lookin birds never did it for me...pmsl
I'm more for the romantic comedy type film, you know boy meets girl, they fall in love.....her best mate is more glamorous and has more money.....he falls out of love and in love with the shallow rich bitch......then he has a brainstorm and kicks her to the kerb and goes back to said "girl next door type!"
Ahhhhhhhhhh ain't love grand...tee hee
For those of you who love a good mystery or thriller with a few twists..I can highly recommend Gothika...its just fantastic, one of those films that you never really know what is the truth and wot your supposed to believe until the last 5 mins, truely on the edge of your seat stuff.......and if that's not enough encouragement it's got the delicious, "I want a body like hers, please God!"........Halle Berry in...now her, I could deffo fancy...lmao
But enough of that...lol
Get outside, go enjoy the sunshine, spread a little happiness wherever you go and make the world a better place..............hmmmm or maybe just make people think that your a f*ckin day release nut job with an inane fixed smile on your face...lmao
Happy Sun Lovin Babes...mwah
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:47:00 am  
Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting etc etc etc
Friday, April 23, 2004

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun,
And I say it's all right

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter
Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
And I say it's all right

Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
And I say it's all right

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...

Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun,
And I say it's all right
It's all right

Here Comes the Sun
Writer, lead vocal: George Harrison

The sun is streaming through the window and the words came into my head. It lifts me up. Yet makes me feel safe and comforted, it's one of my favourites.
And so its words ring true. It's been a long time since we've had a day like today weather wise, and the weekend just promises to get better. I'm not gonna run out and put shorts on that would be truly horrifying although I am sad to say i have seen people in them.
Come on people, yes it's sunny but we are not ready to see ugly white hairy legs. I think this year I might try the sundome thing for a little colour. I know I shouldn't but I have never ever even been on a sunbed. The only type of artificial tan I have ever had was from a bottle and we all know how that turns out! I am one of those unfortunate people that look at others with envy. For I am exceedingly fair skinned, and I rarely if ever brown. I have a few times but not the honeyed haze i would like, more like I've wiped a cold teabag down my arms. I am truly envious of those who don't burn who just seem to brown. Now burn I do, I burn quickly and easily, even with cream. I just want to look healthy, Instead of grey and pale. I don't want to turn mahogany just a little honeyed on my legs which manage to stay eternally white, even when my arms manage a little colour. I understand it's now in to be white, but not polar white!

Today is St Georges day! St GeorgeWhy isn't it a day of national celebration? Why isn't it a Bank Holiday? It should be. I'm feeling a bit patriotic this afternoon ( probably due to all the England stuff flooding into the shops in town for Euro 2004 or whatever. I'm not a kissball fan. Rugby, now thats another story. I love going toTwickenham the atmosphere is electric, and it's safe to take princess who also loves Rugby luckily.) Ooooh the smell of algipan and deep heat grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Yes I love rugby!
Maybe we should make a stand and fight for it? Actually Brb I am sure on the web there probably is one! Here's one! The value of St Georges Day

I imagine your getting used to me going off on tangents now! Well if you aren't you'd better get used to it cos it's all i ever seem to do!
In blogland
Hans is boasting that he has a "thin the veil of intelligence and sophistication" I'm sure he has he's a gent. Fluffy Is getting all physcological with the help of science fiction Stuart has been busy posting and commenting. I have visited many others but I can't be arsed to link everyone! Hans is a new friend to us at "Stop" I find him very entertaining, and he's been a darling and linked us too,we like that very much.
Oh well time to go and make dinner and catch up with Hollyoaks. I might just go mad and post later tonight!!!!!!
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 5:12:00 pm  
Off on Tangents AGAIN
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Since there was fuck all on the telly tonight hubby and I decided to watch a DVD. Wasn't I being a good wifey? Spending time with hubby instead of plugged into my life support system!
Christmas 2002 I bought hubby Minority Report and I still hadn't found the time to watch it.(he had) So cuppa in hand we settled down to view.
It wasn't at all like I thought it would be, I don't really know what I expected. I didn't expect the stunning effects, the story line was good and it had a few twists and turns that kept me guessing. The bonus for me was at the end. Tom Cruise with a shaven head Gggggrrrrrrrrrrrr. Full head of hair he's just a normal guy to me but sheared It really brings out his eyes.
Film star wise there are several 100 guys that do it for me! The ones everyone likes, George Clooney, Bruce Willis, Keanu ( in leather of course) and the unconventional ones Adam Sandler (can't explain why I just love him) I also have a thing for Alan Rickman (devilish and what a voice) oh and Hugh Grant, but only with short hair! He could talk me into bed anytime!
Attraction works be it physical or mental we all have someone out there we can't get enough of. And we all have people who we couldn't bare to be near us!

Now i am really off on one of my tangents lmao Are you managing to keep up?

My sweary post was fun this afternoon, Got the ball rolling a bit didn't it? LOL It's actually not something I am hugely proud of, that I swear so much, I guess it becomes a habit with time. Don't get me wrong I don't swear 24/7 but I know I swear more than i should. Do i need rehab?

I managed to get 2 loads of washing dry this pm well chuffed now i have to iron the damn stuff I have another load out on the line still I couldn't be bothered to bring it in!
I had another bike ride so I've done really well exercise wise today! Pretty amazing actually.
The bread was yummy I know I shouldn't but I had a tepid slice with real butter on it just thinly cos I don't really like salted butter but it went down nicely!
Oh well i guess i should shut up about now I could go on and on and bore the shit out of you! I'm beginning to bore me oh well!
Nighty nights
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:44:00 pm  
Hey you..... two sweary ladies.....lol
Maybe you should do some kind of charity event with your excellant shitk*cking vocabualry.....pmsl
I'm sure you could raise a fortune with your extensive repatoir and unusual usage for the many oh so often miss-used words for the female genetalia..mainly the c*nt word, which I'm happy to agree with Scarlet is my absolute fav swear word, although I'd never use it when describing someone........only when describing my "bits" and wot I would like done to them...pmsl And strangley enough the emphasis on the letters "C" and "T" really do things for me...lol Hmmm maybe too much info there, might be attracting the wrong kind of audience.....awww who gives a f*ck, an audience with a varied view is what we need...lol
F*ck is good too, I am with you on that one Lou Lou, but best of all is when you string 'em together....you know make it sound like you really know wot ya talkin about........"F*ckin c*nt" is always good...gives me a little thrill...lmao
God..how the world has changed....I can remember the first time I said F*ck infornt of my parents......I think my Dad wanted to skin me alive and then boil me in hot fat......he had to settle for a swift disapproving glance that sent the fear of dread right down my spine......ffs i was 19 at the time...lol Wot a sad cow I was.......
Well enough of me spouting on about f*ckin swearing and sounding like a fish wife.....and for those of you who don't make full use of that fantastic, creative and colourful expletive vocabulary...shame on you , you miserable f*cks...Go, go now into the streets and yell your lungs out..............
"THANK F*CK I'M ALIVE.....!!!" Tee Hee
Feel better?
Love Ya
OOOOOh I feel good,
posted by Lou Lou @ 3:55:00 pm  
I love to Swear

Yes, i love to swear. Personally i feel very liberated by certain words.
Now , i tend to not direct my swearing a people because that just isn't nice, unless of course it is my boss who is a fucking cunty Mc cuntison, shitkicker,twat and a big motherfucker. ( ohhhh that feels better already )
Now many of you might already know this but my favourite profanity is ofcourse the word "cunt" then ofcourse "twat" comes in at a close second.
Now i get great pleasure from saying this to certain people only.
My friend who is a socialist worker, and thinks the word "cunt" is quite disgusting and insulting to women. Now this pisses me off.

1. I am a woman if i wish to say " cunt" than why the hell not, you never hear of men pissing and moaning over the word "cock" or "dick" now do you?
2. I just love saying it to her.
You should hear our conversations, you will never hear said so many " yeah what a fucking cunt" in one conversation.
Now if i can respect her socialist worker views on the world then surely she can respect my CUNT.

posted by Lou Lou @ 1:55:00 pm  
Hello my name is Lou Lou, I am 30 1/2 years old and I am addicted to being Sweary.
As a child I was brought up to speak nicely, which I aim still able to do when I want to. I don't mean cut glass just nicely. (Although I do have an annoying knack of picking up accents very quickly! I'll leave that for another post sometime) I was a good child who didn't use bad language, even when amongst ones contempories. Teen years hit and I discovered shit, that delightful word that can be used in so many ways. "that's shit hot that is "Oooooo you stood in shit". I also used bloody, bugger, and bollocks. As i grew older I discovered there were even more words and my fascination with them just grew and grew. After all sweary words are so expressive. I have never much liked the word wanker, although I do tend to use it when driving, also now I tend to say things are "wank". Fuck as a word can be so very very expressive I have to admit it's a favourite of mine much to my mothers disgust. Yes I'm not that faint hearted I swear in front of my Mum, now you are shreiking in horror. She doesn't like it but she accepts it's me, and yes she tells me off for it.
Some people might say it's because I have a limited vocabulary and that's why i swear. Its not. I am excellent at English and have a great vocab. I swear because i like it. I swear because it's expressive and i only need to use one word to convey my mood rather than 5. I swear mainly due to frustration. I don't swear at work apart from the odd bloody, bugger or shit as I walk into a desk for the 4th time that day! I swear mainly when I am drunk and i swear lots when I am with Scarlet and when i am talking on the phone to Scarlet. I swear when I am talking to myself.
My name is Lou Lou and I am sweary!
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 1:22:00 pm  
From bread to weight and back to bread!
Yummy the smell of almost baked bread is spiraling up the stairs, teasing and tantalising i'm starting to get hungry. I haven't indulged in luncheon yet, I'm holding off for nice fresh baked bread. The breadmaker was christmas pressie, well purchased with vouchers we got for christmas. After lusting after one for ages we took the plunge and bought one. I bake almost all my own bread now. I have used a couple of processed ones I have had n the freezer inbetween, but 98% of the bead we eat in this house is baked by my own fair hands lol.
I'm not very adventurous yet though. I make a cracking white loaf. I have been a bit bolder and added some sun dried tomatoes to one and cheese and onion to another a few times. I plan to buy myself a groovy recipe book and try out some other things too. T has a book with a lardy cake in it (drooling at the thought) she's gonna email it to me so i can give it a go. I rather fancy making some sunflower seed bread too. I am very partial to these, I usually have a handfull on my breakfast in the morning *hears bread machine beeping 5 mins left warning* and usually i dip into them several times in the day, they are so moreish. Bread is one of my favourite foods that and pasta. Maybe thats why now i've hit 30 i'm increasing in size!
Thats what the specimen bottle is for. I gotta pee in it for 24 hours to be analysed re my weight gain. This is because I can't lose any weight no matter how good I am and it is going up by 1lb a week steadily no matter what I do. I've had my thyroid done and it's fine. It's kind of a big mystery. The initial weight gain of 1/2 stone appeared suddenly over 2 weeks. it's happened to me before but last time I put on 1 1/2 stone in 3 weeks! For no reason I did loads of tests including pregnancy and all were fine. Then suddenly i lost the lot through doing nothing and went back to being a size 8 again! My body is complex I am beginning to think about donating it to science....if they want me! They can always say NO!
I am getting a little concerned now actually. I am starting not exactly to obsess about my weight but it is bothering me. This is probably because It really has never been an issue to me before, I went on my first diet in November last year! Don't worry i am not going to develop an eating disorder or anything I like food too much to starve myself or waste it by barfing it all up. I just have concerns. The doctor says I am within my BMI so I'm normal but she understands that my weight now is not normal for me. I've gone up another kg in one week again. Depressing. I refuse to buy a size 14. If shops want to make a 13 that would be great. I'm getting too big for a 12 but I am a bit too small for a 14 still. I don't want to be a size 8 again. I'll settle for a big 10/small 12, i like having tits lol
Here I go again blithering on and on I really need to get out more lol breads ready now anyway must let it cool before I slice it!!!! Yummy
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 12:50:00 pm  
My Day Off So Far................
I was shocked awake by sunshine streaming though the curtains ( note to self buy a blackout blind) Princess jumping on my bed shouting "its sunny, it's sunny, it's sunny!"
I had made the mistake of promising her that if the whether is nice and it being my day off work I would cycle the 2 miles to school with her. Aaaaaaarrrrrggggggggghhhhhh
I was barely awake i had already put the alarm on snooze 3 times! I gave in.
We left on time, we got to school on time. I kissed her goodbye and then began my journey home!
To start with i have a bumpy lane full of potholes to contend with, which i negotiated well. Once at the junction for the main road I realised to my horror the way we had come was a one way street. I could hardly cycle down there, so I turned left. Down the narrow, hilly road. ( I feel claustrophobic driving down it in the car.) At the bottom of the hilly bit there's a natural spring type thingy by the brook. The road there is flooded. Coasting through it i got a face full of murky water that tasted muddy yet sweet and a hefty spray of it up my bum and back ( why didn't i let hubby give me mudguards?) Will come home a different way with princess don't want her on that road!
I bravely negotiated the right hand turn up hill and went on my way.. The double roundabout, i was too chicken so I got off and crossed . I then pondered on my next move I had to pop to the doctors to collect a specimen bottle thingy and should i pop home and get the car? Or carry on on my bike? , I did have the rucksac to carry it. So on I went onto the cycle path when it started and panting a little, legs like jelly meandered into the surgery.
At the desk I mumbled "Excuse me I have a 24 hour specimen bottle to collect" Oh yes blaaa blaaa blaa could she say my name any louder? I cringed as the 2 litre bottle was handed over the counter and i hastily stuffed it into my bag. Mortified I left and cycled home.
Knackered i flopped onto my bed to recoup and then staggered to get a cuppa. I managed to brave 10 mins of Trisha and then set about the washing. I have 3 loads to get done and dry today. I 've been a good girl and got the bread maker going too. I'll do the 3ft ironing pile tonight maybe if i feel like it lol, before i start the stuff i have managed to get done today. I've had a bit of a tidy up too. I'll have to pull my finger out later and do a bit more can't be arsed right now at all . So here I am having a little me time, been hopping in out of blogs. Scarlet and I are gonna have a game of canasta in a bit when she gets back from buying fags. Ooooh i love canasta
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:47:00 am  
My life is sh*t.........
Well compared to your two's technicolour wonderland of a life....mine is definitely still in black and white..LOL
God next to nothing has happened...as for those of you who maybe interested in the state of my marriage..hmmmm its kind of in limbo..neither one of us wanting to do the "big talk" or make any major decisions...these things are f*ckin complicated especially when kids are invovled. But hey we're still talkin and laughin occasionally that's gotta be a good thing...isn't it?
Work is fairly quiet, middle of the month so people are a bit tight on the finances so they stretch last weeks shop those few days extra...all hell will be let loose at the weekend though......that "sunny" weather forecast does wonders for supermarket trade..lol
As I work late at night you get a whole different breed of customer...you know the ones that you'd cross the street to avoid.....well when they're standing infront of you grinning its pretty difficult to do anything else but grin..... insanely back...lol
I have a customer...I use that term loosely I mean I'm not a "lady of the night" or anything......who I've seen in the store for years, we exchange pleasantries and he flirts with me occasionally and if i'm in the mood I'll flirt back and wind him up outrageously, but never in an offensive way...well not until last night.
He comes to my till and winks at me, nothing unusual there and then he points in his basket and says "One of these is for you!" and winks again.....well at this point I am serving someone else so missed wot it is he is pointing to and just nod politely...LOL It's something us checkout girls are well practiced at......like "Yes Madam (can you please pack your shoppin a bit f*ckin quicker you're holding everyone else up and making me look like a complete tosser!) that would be £82.37 please!!!!" BIG BROAD SMILE and flash of some pearly whites.......and then the f*ckin bitch, after having waited for her to pack all her goods...hands me a God-Damn credit card....AAArrrrghghghgh...and then takes another 5 mins searching through her too-f*ckin small purse for her "loyalty card"....OMG wot is wrong with these people?????? pmsl OOOps sorry I've done a Lou Lou here, I mean gone off at a tangent.....sorry back to said customer..."Mr Flirty!" He was pointing to a pack of three....OMG (condoms for you lesser mortals)...and "one of them was for me!!!???" My oh so polite checkout girl head was momentarily forgotten as the smoke of hell fire raged from my nostrils and ears...lol I leant of the till and whispered, politley of course...."I don't f*ckin think so!!!" Needless to say, I don't think Mr Flirty will be coming through my checkout anytime soon...do you??
Sad F*ck!!
Good day all
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:33:00 am  
my wonderful twatty mother
Wednesday, April 21, 2004
My mother............where do i start, has much as i love that crazy biatch, she does manage to do my head well and truly in!
Well this week i managed to skive an extra day of work , so mother suggested we all get together, so be it .( with a heavy heart)
my sister, mother and i all go off into town shopping. A little girls day out shopping then lunch and then our trip to our long suffering hairdresser .
what could be more fun that that.
Shopping was a pain in the arse, nothing my mum tried on she didn't like she moaned and groaned about the money my sister and i paid for clothes while we were at the checkout, she piped up, speaking in a loud embrassing voice
" when you two were kids we used to kit you all out in jumble sale clothes we would never dream of spending the money you do on clothes "so on.and so on........at which point my sister and i just wanted to crawl up our own arses and die, or smack her on the head with a wire hanger. The poor checkout girl looked at us with a kind nod, so i made a jesture to suggest she is a bit looney tunes and we made a quick exit.
We had lunch which was pleasant enough,then my brother phoned to say he has arrived with his mate for a few days, so off we go to the hairdressers to have a quick wash and blow dry, now my hairdresser is a young girl, with a very unsavoury boyfriend whom happens to live near my mother, she ofcourse did not know this , and goes into how bad the neighbourhood has got since he has moved in , now i could hear her saying this, but could ont get eye contact with the crazy loon to shut her up, so i fake a coughing fit, a really bad one which lasted 5 mins or more. When she ran off to get some water i told her SHUT UP , ITS HER BOYFRIEND. She then digs a bigger hole trying to say
"ohhhhhh but he is a lovely boy," i just wish she taught her a lession by giving her a mullet.( but she gave her the usual kevin keegan do)
Off we go our separate ways i am mentally exhausted, by this point my sister, the bitch faked a headache and got away after lunch.
When i walked into my mums house that evening, with one of her shopping bags she had left behind. I was comfronted with a site of my brothers friend and my mum. They had managed to super glue themselves to the kitchen lino, my first thought was they were playing twister. My dad had the video camera pissing himself laughing at them and my broither, i think had already pissed himself.
Apparently she tried to glue the heel of his shoe together, while he had them on.
I mean who does that..... except mental people...... i think i have my answer.
bless her cotton socks.
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:22:00 pm  
What a perfect day NOT
I am knackered its been a bitch of a day. Got up head was swimming, got to work head was swimming. Slowly got better God only knows how! We were manic all morning until we closed for a "meeting" at 11am. People were not impressed. The said meeting was very important It lasted 3 hours, yes they did supply lunch but ffs. It was all very interesting of course (NOT), not that i bothered taking notes in particular, a few keywords which will mean nowt to me tomorrow! Anyway Finally reopened at 2pm. The phones went mad, not quite as bad as in the morning but the front desk was heaving with traffic today.
Wednesday is my full day. I like lunch times on Wednesday i meet with a couple of colleagues and we pop out for lunch together its girly and fun plus it gives us a breather from the madhouse! (Missed that today sob)
Staggered out tonight got home and demanded take away. So we went to visit E, at the best kebab shop in town, ok the only kebab shop in town but he does excellent donners. He also does lush burgers and pizzas too. We had burgers. Now i feel podgy but full, mind you the bowl of weetabix i sneaked upstairs with, to lock myself in the spare room and play on here has helped that.
Have had lovely comments and lots of visits would like to thank Fluffy andHans for their links to us xxxxx
Basically a pretty shitty day I feel crappy still and I might even consider having an early night! Yeah right I won't be able to sleep anyway.
I will bugger off now and stop boring you all with my whining and details of my oh so crappy day.
Lou Lou
xxxxx :)
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:18:00 pm  
Not as short and sweet as I planned!
Tuesday, April 20, 2004
Well I got em done. T bless her heart did my eyebrows you can see my eyes now!!! Looking good and no pain well hardly. Although she made me sneeze. For some unknown reason I sneeze when the hairs nearest the centre of my brow are plucked! (Freak yes I know) Also we ventured to the territory covered in my last post, no not the fake tan but the dreaded tash!
The kiddies gathered round (to my horror) and watched as the hot wax was applied in thin coats and left to harden. This prompted them to beg to touch it! LMAO I have no idea why they were so fascinated but what the hell i let em! (once it was cold) T told me to brace myself and yanked! It was not without pain but not too bad and all one side in one go no missed patches. Whilst the other side was being applied T the bitch got the bloody camera out. She (yes i know you are reading this!!!) got several truly delightful piccies of moi a la wax tash and even managed to entice a pose from me me thinks I might regret that one! Anyway as usual a truly fantastic job ta Babe xxxxx
Day wise.
Work hell as usual, so very busy no time to stop and chat, time to make several cups of tea for my fellow slaves (my turn today!) to sup hot if we were lucky cold in most cases. Tea/coffee is most important we can't function without it heaven forbid if we tried LOL Got home finally, popped online briefly and then went to collect princess from school. She had a good day and then dashed home to get sorted before we cycled to T's house.
I will ache tomorrow, well my butt will LOL Thought since the sun was shining and all that we would take the bikes for a change! We are lucky enough to have cycle paths, even though we live in the back of beyond!! Princess for once didn't keep getting off her bike and walking which is amazing. She kept a nice speed going. We finally got home at 6.20pm ish hubby was waiting for his dinner ( oh so sorry to actually have a life for a change and do something that i wanted to do like spend a little time with my mate and drink tea and gossip)
Tonight, well I'm on here hubby is fast asleep already! I've been popping about in blogland saying hello and reading about everyone's day Fluffy has a new hair do, and Stuart has changed his piccie and ZoeIs feeling really poorly to name but a few I have stopped in to see, oh and Laura has had a successful tanning session why oh why can't i get it right? Its a cruel cruel world.......
Oh well better go see if i have any email, asides from the usual shit offering me viagra and extensions to my manhood LOL
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:04:00 pm  
Sometimes you two scare the heebie jeebies outta me....lmao
If I'd never of attempted waxing before..after reading your two's previous history on the subject I think I'd of been scared outta my wits...lol
As it is I tried waxing..bikini line...for the first time a few weeks ago......was f*ckin petrified!!!! Lucky for me my best friend, Lillie I love you x, is a beautician among other things...and she was very patient with me..me being a neurotic "waxing virgin!" It hurt, boy did it hurt...but not as bad as I thought and one side I actually giggled the whole way through...you see I have a really ticklish, sensitive bit down there and well....I just couldn't help it!!!! I'm due to go again soon.....I'm workin up to it...slowly!
As for creams and shit...never attempted any of that stuff on my face....I did used to pluck my eyebrows, took a 6 weeks beautician course once and was always a good girl where my eyebrows were concerned...but sadly motherhood and life in general has robbed me of any real time to spend on oneself so I do the quickest thing possible...shave them...lol
I know an entire nation of women are gasping and recoiling in horror...I mean calm down...I don't shave all the f*ckers off..lol Just into a nice neat shape..and believe me for those of you who didn't know, you couldn't tell, well not unless you have CCTV in my f*ckin bathroom...pmsl
Anyway enough of waxing, shaving and other less exiting things...I'm starting to itch all over. I think I'd rather have another tattoo than rip the hair off my face with wax....ugh what a thought.
Later Ladies....oh and gents if your listening.... mwah
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:37:00 am  
Beauty = Pain = or Fuck up if you are me!
Monday, April 19, 2004
Now I can relate to that Scarlet!
I have a certain incident which involves my top lip and some microwave heated wax.....I ended up with it stuck up my nose one time.
Oh and that evil cold wax strips, on my top lip fuck me.......... It was sore, it didn't work, I got all scabby and spotty. I was left with a scabby spotty tash instead of the lightly feathery one I was trying to remove. Me and beauty procedures don't go together well. Shall I delight you all with another woeful tale?
Moi, looking a little tired and wan. Cue fake tan for a little colour on my face..........I carefully exfoliated, moisturized did everything I was supposed to do. I delicately added fake tan to my face, evenly I dried and an hour or so later I went to bed thinking how sunkissed I would look in the morning! How wrong can a girl be?
TANGOED I had been tangoed in the dead of night someone crept into my room and fucking tangoed me. I was so orange I almost peed my pants!!!! Out came the exfoliant,
I used a nailbrush even, I scrubbed and scrubbed I used every product I could safely use and I even considered jif! Sometime later I emerged from the bathroom clouded in talc and pressed powder even whiter than I had started! Me and Beauty procedures I told you they just don't go.
BTW tomorrow T is gonna do my eyebrows for me she used to be a beautician so she is well quick and doesn't hurt much. I have been growing them back to try a new shape lmao At the mo they look well bushy. At least I am not going to try doing them myself.....Given my tack record you just know they'd be a fuck up!!!!!!!
Oh just a quick addition. The rest of my day was shit, work was mental how I didn't tell someone to fuck off is beyond me.....We have days like that.....But some people really try your patience!!! On the plus side me and hubby did a fab dinner together, Yummy. Food I love food.
Night all
Lou Lou

posted by Lou Lou @ 11:35:00 pm  
Warm weather and all it entails
Well ladies yes ladies and not men, unless you're into male grooming to a sadistic level.
Warmer weather means waxing, bleaching and and anything that causes pain in the persuit of beauty, and not really beauty just to stop people and small children stopping in the street shouting why has that lady got hairy armpits and legs like daddy, and there poor mothers having to shield there poor trumatised eyes away from the freaky lady.
Now the first time i did this , i thought i would do the it all in one go, armpits legs and my front bottom. Well i thought i would use hair removing cream for delicate area's and wax for everything else,waxing feels like, if you have never done it before, IT FUCKING HURTS.
Another tip is to get someone else to do it for you because once you have ripped off one strip you really don't wanna go there again but it is too late because you have covered you entire body in the shit, when this happened to me my mother found me rocking, quietly sobbing in the corner of a room and covered in wax shite, to add to the humilation i had my arms over my head due to the friggin'wax. She did ofcourse help me and then ran a cold bath,
which ofcourse in the meantime these happy moments where occuring i had left the hair removal cream on my front bottom longer than was advised, which ofcourse took the top layer of my skin off.
But hey, i did it, i was hairless, i was ready to face the public in my skippy summer clothes and off i went, with my head held high ( although could not look mother in the eyes for several weeks). I was looking foxy until........ a small child shouted " mummy that lady is scary"" to which the mother shielded that poor childs eyes from me and said "it is rude to stare at people who have been burnt, thats why i am telling you to keep out of the kitchen when i am cooking"
But hey, i through my head back with my hairless but skinless legs, and armpits . and walked of into the sunset (like i shit myself , due to the front bottom incident)
Still looking good though
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:53:00 pm  
Where do I start babe................Lou Lou you've gone mad with the postings....lol I dunno which subject to pick up on first???
Maybe I should just waffle on aimlessly like I usually do and hope for the best...something mildly interesting and you never know funny may appear from this otherwise mundane life of mine...lmao
Wellllllll here goes....kids have one more day of grace in this part of the country, so had one more day to spend with my "little angels".......oldest daughter was at her Dad's..(long story..don't even go there!) and the "boy" had his friend over and trashed his bedroom in the fashion that only 6 year olds can, while all the time sounding like they had an entire rugby team up there in training and only just keeping the plaster from detaching itself from the living room ceiling!!!!! Boys hey????? Still they did tidy up after...well I say tidy...hmmmmm I'll tackle it tomorrow while he's at school...lol
That just left me and the little 'un, we danced and played all day...... its amazing how varied a 2 year old's musical tastes are...poor child has to endure her mother's obsession with all that is Glam Rock...lol
I swear I was born in the wrong era...I mean I am a 70's kid but I should of been a teenager then I could of reveled in the weird make-up...... courtesy of Ziggy Stardust, outrageous haircuts...think no further than Dave Hill of the mega band Slade and as for platforms...well Rod Stewart/Elton John lead me on with yur Hot Legs, Maggie May as the Pinball Wizard says Goodbye Yellow Brick Road...lmao For all those of you who are now totally bemused......who gives a f*ckin shit...lol
I know wot I like and I like wot I know...lol
Now go on up to the attic, get out all your old vinyls.......pop a bottle of Mateus Red and get down to whatever floats your boat...Baby!!
Peace and Love Man!!
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:23:00 pm  
Back to School
At last half term is over and the princess returned to school this morning.
(Now you really must ask Scarlet to tell you about her morning and how eager her lad was to go back to school and how eager Scarlet was to get him back to school LMAO) (Guess of what happened in the comments box please before she puts you out of your misery!)
Not that she wanted to get out of bed, not that she was in any particular hurry to get dressed and stuff her breakfast down her. She was excited about wearing her new shoes though! Oh and her German lesson this afternoon. I choose to pay for an after school club for German lessons for her. 7 is a fantastic age to start learning a language, she's picking it up well. I also taught her a little French before we went to Eurodisney for Christmas (Lucky buggers weren't we!) now every time she farts she says "Pardonez Moi!" She's so cute!
Well I'm on just briefly before I finish getting ready to go to work. I have a late today which isn't too bad. We are often very very busy so the time flies by! Anyhow just want to share with you the really twatty thing I managed to do this morning.
Whilst straightening my hair I was distracted for a moment, reached to pick the straighteners up again and picked up the wrong end! There were a number of expletives followed by a dash to the bathroom and the cold tap being run. It fucking hurts. It hurts now and it's been a few hours, no obvious blister yet but its there, it's lurking. Why oh why am I so stupid? I did my thumb last week! Oh well it makes a change from the iron I suppose! What a twat I am!
Lou Lou xxx
posted by Lou Lou @ 1:46:00 pm  
The Best New Show on TV
Sunday, April 18, 2004
This my friends is the best new show on tv. Showing at 6.30pm on a sunday night on Channel 4. ( and shows the next weeks episode right after if you have E4) Orange County, home of the beautiful people, who's lives get as shit as normal peoples I love it! Its fantastic. Its must see viewing. It appeals to teens, 20 somethings and 30 somethings and maybe older ( i haven't asked anyone that old hahaha) but anyway if you haven't already seen it go take a look it's addictive.
Lou lou xxx
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:43:00 pm  
Well that was Shite
All week I have been looking forward to new costume drama on the beeb that is "He knew he was right." Hoping that it would have the promise of their epic production of "Pride and Prejudice".
I am sad to say I was cruelly disappointed. What a load of drivvel. I am so peed off. Not only did they "borrow" the name of Colonel Osborne from Vanity Fair, they also had an evil type aunt. It was utter crap. I spent a whole hour with them going back and forth over the same thing. Very predictable. So very disappointing. Needless to say I will not be tuning in for the 2nd installment next Sunday.
Lou Lou
Bugger I just recalled that it was Major Osbourne in Vanity Fair, Oh well. It was still a shite programme!
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:13:00 pm  
Off at Tangents!
This morning I was awakened to the sound of my princess yelling wake up mummy wake up and my hubby nudging me. When I at last managed to get my eyes opened I was informed that it was 10.30am and that I should eat my breakfast!! They had brought me up a lovely continental breakfast ( I am more of a cereal girl but can't complain at this unexpected treat!)
We all sat up in bed munching and watching the London marathon. Now I don't deny that people do this for worthwhile causes, because they do and amazing they are, but it makes me feel knackered just to watch them. Of course once the true athletes have finished it's back to the really competitors people like you and like me who decide to run 26 miles dressed in whatever mad outfit they can find that will quite possible enable them to loose at least 1 stone in sweat ( now there's an idea.........!) One such man I noticed was carrying an ironing board on his back "simply because no one had done it before!"
I think these people are truly amazing It's a crazy enough thing to run 26 miles but to do it encumbered takes true grit. I only wish I had the guts to do it myself. That's something I am pretty sure will never happen, I am knackered after 20mins on the treadmill!!!!! So all those amazing people take a bow, your are truly inspirational.

The rest of the day has been mellow too. A dash round with the hoover, I always find that very satisfying! And a lovely cuppa and a chat well a catch up on gossip with my close mate T. She'd been away for Easter and I have missed her. She brought me a lovely pressie. Its a candle holder made of a rock type crystal. She tells me it is a salt crystal and that I should have it lit when I am on the PC and it takes all the crap out of the air. I am very intrigued by this and plan to look into it. Any of you know anything about it?
This afternoon I have flitted about catching up on a weekends reading of my fave blogs, some of which I haven't linked to yet but that's cos I keep cocking it all up! I need to set aside some time to have a play and work it all out. ( well work out why they appear in the wring places anyway!!) I really need to learn more about html!
Princess is playing happily after giving me a super new hairdo!!!! Well covered my head in little clips anyway! Thank god she hasn't got her make up out yet too! Sssssshhhhh she will hear me and run in to do "pretty things to mummy"!!! I once forgot she had done this and answered the door! The reaction from the caller was one of mild hysterics lmao. Oh well I don't mind really. She's an only child, but a happy only child and I wouldn't consider her an lonely only child. In the past people have often questioned why I only have one, the reason being I never felt ready to have another. (That and I endured an amount of trauma having her and I suffered from pre eclampsia.) Princess turned 7 last month, and I am 31 this year. Have I left it too late? At times I really really want another, at others I'm happy enough and content with what I have. Is it a mistake to not have another? I don't want to regret it when I am older.......
Oh well I'm off at tangents today, well that's pretty normal for me, I always go off on them!!! My friends keep up most of the time! Hubby can't though, not always! LOL I'll shut up now and go and make some dinner!!!! I really do blither on sometimes
Lou Lou xxxxx
posted by Lou Lou @ 5:04:00 pm  
AAAAaah at last, half term is almost over..tee hee.
The kids will be out of my hair, well two of them anyhow...it will be just me and the little 'un. It's not been a bad fortnight though...apart from the marriage situation...but hey you can't have everything can you?
Had our first official Bar b Que yesterday.....turned into its usual sacrificial burning of all that is edible...lol I've learnt form previous outings of said man past time to get in extra food.....as the first round of burgers and sausages usually come under heavy assault and could quite easily have a dual purpose as charcoal, well the kids did try and write on the patio with a rather lovingly burnt Lincolnshire sausage....lol
Luckily for "him" the family seem to enjoy his burnt offerings...either they are too polite to say otherwise or they have just grown accustomed to them over the years!!!!
I think this year would be the time to invest in a gas Bar b Que, maybe then we could all appreciate the real taste of meat as it was meant........well hopefully!
So another week is over and the new one has already reared its ugly head......time to get ready the school uniform and PE kit and scrub the old paint apron...no more lie-ins...ugh, wot was I saying about being glad that half term is over........lol What was I thinkin............give them another week....lol
See ya
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:08:00 am  
Eat, drink and be merry..........
Friday, April 16, 2004
Eat drink and be merry is what i say, just popped on the scales and low and behold i have put on yet, added extra pounds over easter.
Conclusion..........................who gives a friggin' shite! Yes its a bold statement.
But hey what is there to life if we cannot enjoy a good glass of wine, good food and most of all good company, okay i say glass of wine, i mean a few bottles and good food , well eating good food until you might hurl your guts up, and well good company i mean people who make you laugh untill a little pee comes out.
Yes i know what you are all thinking, she won't be saying that when the summer comes, and she can't fit her fat arse into anything other than a small marquee.
And yes, you probaly are right, but please just indulge me on this one occasion and follow suit, eat, drink and be merry.
You never know we could start a revolution, or maybe bring marquee's into the fashion world, who knows what we can achieve.
posted by Lou Lou @ 11:20:00 pm  
Man Cleaning?
Well what I was planning to post about just fucked up so we will have to forget about that!!! Been another long day. Came home to a pigsty! My Princess had spilt 1/2 bottle of apple juice on the kitchen floor and tried to clean it up herself and not told anyone, hence with each step I took I had to pull my feet free!!!! Oh not to mention the icecream she dropped on there too! Hubby was oblivious and didn't bother to wash the floor!
I particually asked him to hoover today, well it wasn't done. Far from it. Nothing was done. The dishwasher was empty ( i did that) but there were dirty dishes on the worktops, along with crumbs and crisps and just a man mess! Needless to say I was not impressed. When I entered the lounge all was apparent. I could see exactly how his day was spent. Spread all over my dining table was his airfix model of a tank!! Bless I know he's a kid at heart but why oh why can't he wipe surfaces fill a dishwasher and bloody hoover? All my smugness at having an ironing husband vanished! The ironing he is fantastic at, but when it comes to housework in general forget it! I have always been pretty houseproud, I like things just so, i'm not fanatical about it, (Scarlet might say otherwise!) but i do like to have a clean and tidy house. So tonight I have been cleaning ad cleaning and cleaning and I haven't finished yet...................just taking a breaK!! Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh man cleaning just isn't good enough!
lou lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 9:14:00 pm  
Welcome Back......
Hey Scarlet glad to hear you had a good time babe.............except the lack of good lookin, potential shag material. Are all men the same???? Or is it just the goodlookin ones are either gay or married or just too God damn shallow, I mean they're ok for a quick f*ck...but hey, you wouldn't wanna wake up to them for the rest of your natural born...would you? I dunno wot is it we're all lookin for really...? An easy on the eye, ironing, chef, who's fit, has a great arse, come to bed eyes, who will f*ck us till we can't walk straight and bring us tea in bed in the morning before they go to work...lol Or maybe just some of that list, I dunno ladies wot do you reckon?
Had a great day yesterday....Yes, Yes I know my days have not been exactly fantastic lately, but yesterday's was.........took the kids to the Zoo, queued for 20 mins to get in, paid an arm and a leg, walked around for 3 hours with one kid moaning, the other running off at every opportunity, (and Yes for those of you who are regulars I do have 3, the other one is way to cool to be seen dead at the Zoo with a parent, well she was yesterday!) oooh and aaaahed at Monkeys, Lions, Tigers, Snakes and a whole menagerie of other wildlife along with several 1000 other day trippers...lol
But it was cool, I love the Zoo, I never get tired of going and for my youngest its only her second trip and she was totally in awe........and that's something money can't buy. It's wot makes it all worth while.
Keep smiling......and the world thinks you have a secret.
Ssssssh.......... I have!
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:07:00 am  
Welcome home.....weeeeeeeellcome home ....your home at last!
Thursday, April 15, 2004
YAY YAY YAY YAY Scarlet baby you are home, how I have missed you my love!
For the benefit of you dear darling readers ( if there are any our there lmao) Scarlet is my bested friend in the whole wide world. We have been bested buds for years and years and years.....And will always be so. We take the piss out each other constantly talk on the phone at least 5 times a week, sometimes in a day! Plus we are both mad as hatters. She is the bubble to my squeak!!
If I was a lesbian, which I'm not,( or even inclined to be) I would gladly choose Scarlet as my life partner. She of course would be the "man" of the house, her ability to drink me under the table and fart like a guy, and hogger of the remote control of course qualifies her for this role. I take the feminine side simply because when ever I got to her house I do the housework! I know, I know I'm a crazy bitch but I love playing with hoovers!!!!
Welcome Home Scarlet Baby........Now all I need is to hear that you got laid whilst you were away!!!!!! And I want details baby!!!!
Lou Lou
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:52:00 pm  
BONJOUR......I am back..............
Bonjour people,
did you miss me ( don't answer that),
Well i have had the most loveliest break away, i would like to say refreshed but ate too much and drank.........well you do not want to know, lets just say i made a fool of myself more times in a week than normal people make in there lives, but hey who friggin' cares.
Still haven't met a man that i like, but did meet this interesting character that made me laugh alot, and not in a nice warming fashion, but in "what the fuck"........fashion, he claimed he was friends with 2 very big bands and was telling me he had heated discussions with them about the direction they were taking, blah blah.......by which time got very drunk and started matching his bizarre claims, he now thinks i went to school with half the rock stars in the world and the other half owes me favours ( if you know what i mean)
Which brings me to dating, when you meet someone in a pub/club where you don't live you can say absolutely ANYTHING., which i suppose is harmless fun, but on-line dating or meeting some wierdo on the net, can be cruel and dangerous, because people who get sucked into these online dating shite ,usually are very lonely or very friggin' screwed up. lets face it we can say or be whom ever we like, but its fantasy. Don't get me wrong , people who do, in my view are looking for something that they just have not found yet, and this way is just far too convient. I am not saying people have not found true love on the internet, because they have, but mostly people find stalkers, but hey, each to there own , whatever floats your boats baby.
Love scarlet
posted by Lou Lou @ 10:28:00 pm  
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Name: Lou Lou
Home: Europe
About Me: I'm 5ft 3 1/2 and i have green eyes and long brunette hair that tends to have a mind of its own
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